Sunday June 10 2012


Waking up at 11:11 a.m.

Monika, the couch surfer from Poland, departed this morning and left me a note...
You’ve been very nice. You have a wonderful time maintaining this house. Sorry we didn’t get to know each other too much. I’m leaving.
Monika (with a K)

Giving my roommate, Elisa, a ride to work.

Orange Peach Mango Juice. Strawberry Cereal Bar. Apricot.

All day shift at China Wok.

Another hot-ass day in the hot-ass sun.

[Text message]

Kristin: “I thought I wanted to rush into things but you’re right taking it slow is probably best.”

Me: “a slow cooked meal is often the most flavorful and nutritious.”

Kristin: “This may be true of food but all people are different.”

Me: “you’re right and some food is better raw anyway.”

Kristin: “Some food requires more attention than others if you want the finished product to come out right.”

Me: “unless you’re a strawberry or an aloe vera plant. neglect is key. and then feast.”

Kristin: “Right.”

Me: “but you’re not either of those. you’re more like an avocado. I’m waiting till you ripen. then I’m gonna whip you up into a beautiful guacamole.”

Kristin: “That could take years.”

Me: “we’ll see now.”

Now I’m on the phone with her. Our exchange of words includes a critique into each other’s relational behavior and the question marks hover over our heads about where our connection is going.

Chit-chatting with the German couch surfers on lunch break.

Egg Sandwich with Mayonnaise and Tomato. Salt n Vinegar Chips. Honey Green Tea.

A customer hands me a twenty-dollar bill for his $14.63 order and says lackadaisically, “Merry Christmas.” I chuckle in response and thank him.

I crank up the tunes on my iPod and sing a long to old playlists. My spirits are unusually high for no reason except for the pride of life.

Kristin stops in and joins me on deliveries. Not used to the summery hot conditions in the car she says, “I have to blot my face.” She provides me with dark chocolate flavored Coconut Water that makes my day.


Her company is entertaining to say the least. We get into rigorous conversations about this and that and that and this. It’s exhausting at times but always turns around with humor. Her younger years growing up are damaged with religious discipline that have driven her away from any of the spiritual benefits she could have received. Anytime religion is brought up its these feelings that are talked about. Because she’s blocked out so many things related to this from her past she sometimes fears because of my church history that I’m sort of a reminder of that.

Me: “You don’t need to be religious, Kristin. I don’t require that. I just like people who are open to the truth, like searching for the truth. I can’t deal with people who live in fake realities. I don’t want to be around that.”


She raises a question related to Margot, “Do you miss her?”

I pause and think about an answer, “Sometimes. But not enough to just show up at her door.”

Kristin leaves to continue her day. I send her an after text, “thank you for the company and the nourishment. it really livens my wokatory [short for China Wok purgatory].”

Delivering an order in Bancroft Hall. The whole family with their burly dogs are hanging out in the yard. As I walk up with the bags in hand the little girl reacts excitedly, “It’s Chineeeese food!”

Mother scoffs, “Weirdo.”

Me: “It’s okay. I’m a weirdo too.”

The dad, “Weirdos unite!”

Me: “Yup!”

It’s the last leg of my wok-purgatory. I’ve had this Black & Mild cigar in the mid console for a long time. With a burst of inspiration I tear open the package and light it up. With my leg propped up on the seat and Wildchild’s “Renegade Master” bumping on the stereo I feel properly placed in space and time. Puffing out the tasty smoke avoiding the unfortunate fact that it’s after 10:30 and I should be off work by now. At the stoplight. No regard for others. I’m a badass image of what every delivery driver strives to be.

Off work. Back home.

Shrimp with Broccoli, Snow Peas, and Rice. Yuengling Black & Tan.

Watching Addams Family (1991).

Fortune cookie says, “All the answers you need are right there in front of you!”

Sleep sometime around 3 a.m.

[i] Hermann Hesse by Andy Warhol.

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