Monday September 30 2013

Ghostly (Sept 30 2013)[i]

Waking up at 11:05 a.m.

Blueberry Bagel with Vegan Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.

All day shift at China Wok.

On the down time waiting for orders I have plenty of opportunity to read and research on various things. Preparing myself for Obamacare. Laptop radiation exposure when using on lap or in close contact with skin. Limiting exposure to radiation should be a priority. Conclusions I've come to in my research: Using a headset or headphones when talking on cell phone will prevent/lower radiation exposure, texting over placing phone near ear will also limit radiation exposure, when using laptop on lap make sure power cord is unplugged.

"We speculate that keeping a laptop connected wirelessly to the internet on the lap near the testes may result in decreased male fertility."

The most helpful concise article I found...

Use 20-20-20 rule to prevent eye strain in prolonged use of the computer.
"To help you deal with this problem, the 20-20-20 rule suggest that after every 20 minutes, you (the computer user) should take a break for at least 20 seconds and look at objects that are 20 feet away from you."

Five Guy's French Fries with Ketchup. Honey Green Tea.

Kinder Chocolate.

The orders pick up around 5 o'clock. Steve comes in at 6 to help with the dinner rush. He takes down an order over the phone for $292 worth of Chinese food. Wow. It's obviously a desirable order to deliver as it has a 99% chance of being a wealthy tip. Of course, the turn of events don't work out in my favor. He ends up delivering that one along with quite a few others. It's not even him in particular that I don't like. It's just the fact that I get paid under minimum wage to work this whole day and depend on the maximization of orders/tips. He strolls in here for a mere 3 hours and profits more than half of what I'm gonna make today. 


Disdain. Animosity. Anger growing. And now I have to deal with two separate instances where my car won't start because of possible battery failure (I should include that it wasn't hard to find nearby people to offer help). And of course while I'm dealing with this battery bullshit Steve, or Ming, is taking orders that I could be taking if it wasn't for this car problem. Nothing works today. I feel defeated.


I pull up to the restaurant an hour before my shift is done and find Elliott. He's here to scan some show flyers at FedEx next door. Ling gave me an egg roll they couldn't sell that had a hole in it. I slip it under the wipers of Elliott's car. When he comes out of the FedEx office I say, "Oh, it looks like someone gave you an egg roll." Apparently, he's never even tasted an egg roll in his life.

Me: "You mean to tell me out of all the touring and traveling you do, and all the Chinese food you ate, you've never had an egg roll?"


He rides with me on a delivery to Atlantis Apartments, a place known for stiffing. This customer ordered plenty of times before and I know what to expect: nothing. I explain to Elliott that last time I gave them a memo stating that drivers work for tips.

Before I head in I say, "We'll see if it worked."

I come back out with $3.

Me: "It worked! It really worked!"

Off work and back home.

Hot and Sour Soup with Broccoli and Rice. Kinder Chocolate.

Watching Shadow Dancer (2012).

Taking my bike for a ride. I make my destination Lynnhaven Middle School's track field off First Colonial. I'm surprised to find a ghostly white mist hovering over the grass; all the objects and structures I'm familiar with during the day now look drastically transformed. It's like the dark side of the moon. I ride lap after lap on the track meet while intently listening to an audio book of The Great Gatsby via iPod. The basketball courts give off a haunting romantic loneliness. I lie down on my back, the concrete cold and slightly moist, and gaze up at the stars. Each one flickers it's own brilliant rhythm. I should do this more often.

Back home.

In the kitchen Kevin and Josh are making bets on whether or not Richie will eat the bat we have in the freezer for $50. Josh doesn't underestimate Richie's barbaric wildness. But Kevin seems to think it's too far out of Richie's league to pull off eating a bat. Sasha comments, "I love this house."

Cinnamon Raisin Bread. Milk.

Sleep 4 a.m.

[i] Image by me.

Sunday September 29 2013

Ana hired at China Wok (Sept 29 2013)[i]

☼ ○ ▬

I'm on the run. A government intelligence agency is looking for me. Crawling in and out of an intricate system of air ducts inside a building; they just miss me every time. I pummel through the walls and dart down staircases. It's a very stressful situation but I'm confident I can safely escape.

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up at 11:20 a.m. As soon as I open the bedroom door to go take a shower Kevin is standing there in shock, "Dude, it's 11:20! Ling got pissed at me last time I was 15 minutes late." I ignore his concerns because I'm not late. I don't have to be in till noon. I guess they make him come in earlier.

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Vegan Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.

Ana stays behind for a little bit as I'm walking out the door for work.

Me: "Bye, babe."

I give her a hug.

Kevin questions what I just said, "Bye babe?"

Me: "Yes! Now don't touch my girlfriend."

Ana ran a few errands in Hilltop and drops by the restaurant with a gift: Strawberry Mochi Ice Cream, complete with a little cardboard note card...

A Treat for Someone Sweet (Sept 29 2013)

She tags along for a while during the lunch rush.

While eating a Fuji Apple I find out she's allergic to apples, but only raw apples.

Delivering an order to Credle Road. Mounted on the front door it says, Love And Laughter Through This Screen Door. A lady opens the door. A big dog assists her with giddy snarls and sniffs.

"Get back, Harley! Get back!" the lady commands. "Don't worry. She's friendly."

Me: "Oh I see."

The dog approaches me with happy heavy breathing desperately vying for my attention.

Tuna Salad Wrap with Tomato and Couscous. Salt n Vinegar Chips. Honey Green Tea.

Sundays are money days. I'm grateful for the big business. The miles and the tips rack up.

After the dinner rush subsides. Standing behind the counter. I tell Steve, "It's like a tidal wave and then it just stops."

Steve: "Yup."

Off work and back home.

Tofu with Broccoli, Carrots, Onions, and Rice in Garlic Sauce.

Watching Promised Land (2012).

Cinnamon Bread. Milk.

Sleep 4 a.m.

[i] Images by me.

Saturday September 28 2013

Ilya Bolotowsky.[i]

Waking up around 1:30 p.m.

Strawberry Toaster Pastries. Orange Juice.

Getting my basic diet of articles and research online – profound experiences in space, female objectification in pop music, jaguar awesomeness.


Tuna Salad Wrap with Couscous and Tomato. Veggie and Flax Seed Tortilla Chips with Salsa. Lemon Water.

Watching Promised Land (2012).

Shooting some solo hoops.

At Tapped, a gastro pub across the street from Chanticleer. I have a gig with Mike Gombas and Chris Kendrick. I've never been here before. Kevin raves on about this place as he makes appearances here on a regular basis. It's a slightly uppity place but they've got $2.50 specials on a Czech beer.

Ana Southern Belle (Sept 28 2012)[ii]

Sitting at the table with Ana. She's adorned in black pants and a deep red buttoned up shirt that only accentuates her charm. I pull out my small notebook for us to jot down observations and thoughts as the show happens (her words in italics).

"Comfortable hues of burgundy.
A 60's tune brings a smile to my face.
There's a warm welcoming presence in the air.
Constant laughter. Constant genuine laughter.
Czechvar sits on a napkin square staring coldly at me, waiting, just waiting for that wondrous moment when my sweaty hands will grip it's slender body and gulp, gulp, gulp.
An old friend enters. More laughter. Adding more lemons to my iced water as we chat, and I finish. My mouth is feeling fresh. Showers of satisfaction slip throughout my body.
I feel a soft tap on my shoulder. Ana's tapping the drink menu there. I ask, 'Are you tapping on my shoulder?'
Robert, with his dark blue jeans and dark brown longsleeves, blends in with the burgundy hues. His style of music is a soothing sea. I can see his passion coated around him. And he seems to be charming the audience.
Then starts singing a Weezer song about lack of love making. That's kinda funny because that's exactly how I feel.
A piano song! Cute! Sincere! Sweet! Upbeat!
The word tap seems to be a reoccurring accident tonight."


Sharing a plate of Fried Cheese Trio dipped in Marinara Sauce.

Back at the house we share bowls of Cinnamon Toast Crunch while slightly drunken Kevin demands our attention.

"Leave us alone, Kevin! We're eating cereal. This is serious! It's cereal!"

Upstairs settling down in the bed, both of us exhausted. We take turns caressing each other's backs. While her hand strokes carefully along mine the sexual mood increases. It can only lead to making love.

[i] Ilya Bolotowsky. 
[ii] Filipino Southern Belle. Image by me.

Friday September 27 2013

Music Sheet Piano Bench (Sept 27 2013)[i]

☼ ○ ▬

A tiny baby rabbit shakes nervously in my hands. The warmth of my space I provide makes him feel safe and eventually he stops shaking.

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up around 1:30 p.m.

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Vegan Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.

Cleaning up – researching – reading the latest articles floating around on the internet.

Banana. Trail Mix. Honey Green Tea.

Practicing songs at the storage unit.

Exercising back at the house.

Meeting up with Ana at Susan's Kitchenette, a family run Filipino restaurant near North Hampton Blvd. The Filipino cuisine is already made behind glass in heating basins. We both choose the Chicken and Vegetable Pancit Noodle with Beef Lumpia. It's missing essential flavor so we enhance it with soy sauce and fish sauce. Near us is a gang of older Filipinos sipping on coffee and taking turns at karaoke.


Out in the parking lot. She opens up her car door and it's like clockwork; I feel compelled to peek my head in and snoop at anything I find interesting. Of course she gets playfully defensive and tries to stop my curiosity.

"Can you not? There's nothing for you to see!"

I snag a yellow piece of paper she got from her garden yoga class. She chases me down and I refuse to give it back. There's uncontrollable laughing and giggling.


We go visit James and Angel at The Cure Coffee House in downtown Norfolk. James preps black bean burgers in the back. I sip on a manual pour over Coffee and enjoy a French Toast Muffin. Angel pulls out the acoustic guitar and so we all sing whatever comes up. A slightly drunk and polite man named Allen compliments our voices and also doesn't hesitate to add harmony.

Composer Pins (Sept 27 2013)

Ana and I reconvene at her house. I don't come over here often as we usually spend time in my neck of the woods. Her mom is all cooped up in the bed. They have a mother-daughter chitchat. Mom sits comfortably under the blanket with her little dogs curled up next to her. I notice the Vick's vapor rub that Ana has told me about the addiction she had with it in the past; I also have a fond history with it when I sick as a child. Her mom takes a big whiff.

"It's like dope!" she exclaims.

We laugh. Then she keeps requesting Ana do these little things for her like handing her candy and turning off the lights.


In the kitchen sipping on Blueberry Green Tea, snacking on Popcorn and Suman (sweet rice wrapped in a banana leaf).

If Ana Were a Pillow (Sept 27 2013)

Cuddling on her uncomfortable futon couch. I locate an old journal on the bookshelf that has red and black color themes on the cover. Ana gets embarrassed more than usual here. She's not willing to share much out of it except for a Beethoven quote and a list of goals she wrote out back in 2011. I kind of go through them and check to see if she's accomplished them by now. Then, I find an antique erotica novel I recall letting her borrow some time ago. I read aloud excerpts.

An Odor of Naked Women (Sept 27 2013)

Sometime close to 4 a.m. I leave for home.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Sleep 5:30 a.m.

[i] All images by me.

Thursday September 26 2013

Lebrolverine. Joey Cienian.[i]

☼ ○ ▬

At the bottom of the deep end of a pool, 30 or 40 foot deep, sits a snake that I accidentally dropped. I'm afraid to swim down to retrieve it because I know my ears can't withstand the pressure and will pop. I desperately ask nearby swimmers holding onto the edge if they can help me.

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up around 1 p.m.

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Vegan Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.


While eating lunch safely just in the bedroom over to me I hear the faint sounds of hollering coming through the air vents. There's been some serious squabbling lately between Anthony and Kelley.

Egg Sandwich with Mayonnaise and Tomato. Strawberries. Asian Pear. Honey Green Tea.

At the Rec Center. They've got organized adult basketball every Tuesday and Thursday. It's my first time participating. My team wins some and loses some. But overall I feel thoroughly satisfied with my game play. Making 80% of the shots I take. There's only one moment where an ego battle ensues between one of my teammates and another over something trivial of course. Any second someone could throw a punch or shove but after some intervening it gets squelched.

"C'mon guys! Quit acting childish. Let's just play."

Honey Crisp Apple.


Vegetable Pad Thai. Shrimp Bao.

Watching The Frozen Ground (2013).

James Graves comes over. It's been a while since we've hung out. We embrace the winds of the east on our bikes at the oceanfront. Disturbing Elliott at his place on 16th. While zipping down the boardwalk we talk about our aspirations to be that interesting old guy that kids share stories about.

Back home. Alone in my room. In these late haunting hours in the early morn I find myself drifting off into a nostalgic place remembering an old love, so exotic in my mind's eye...Ays. The act of recalling memories is innocent I believe. A small part of me longs for her again. After staring off into space for a minute I shake out of it and reassure myself it's for the best that in this present moment we are disconnected. I have another beautiful relationship blooming right now that has provided nothing but positive energy in my life. I refuse to taint it.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Sleep 4:30 a.m.

[i] Lebrolverine. Joey Cienian.

Wednesday September 25 2013

Apple Archetype (2)(Sept 25 2013)[i]

1:17 p.m. I open my eyes from a motorcycle dream. I close my eyes. 2:07 p.m. Waking up again from a pizza dream.

Hot Cinnamon Oat Bran with Flax Seed, Brown Sugar, and Milk.

Ana sweetly machine-gun texts me, "I think I left my Aveeno cream facewash in the bathroom upstairs this morning. I washed my face before I left for work. < _ < And I meant to tell you this last night after we transitioned you into the little spoon: I really care about you a lot, and you are very important to me. I do feel a sense of relief everytime we do see each other, and this does feel like a growing relationship...blooming relationship. Thank you for being so patient and understanding towards me."

I reply, "I saved your Aveeno. I sense my importance to you and I share the same sentiment with you. Patience and understanding makes the world a better place."


Grilled Cheese with Hummus and Tomato. Salt n Vinegar Chips. Honey Green Tea.

Watching After Earth (2013).

I get called into China Wok for an hour to help out with Kevin's shift. Making an easy $20.

On the basketball courts. Ana meets me there. Her original intention was to just retrieve her face wash that she left the night before. But I invited her to shoot around with me. The kind of physical movement that basketball requires causes intense laughter spells in Ana. She enjoys this kind of physical activity though, any kind of physical activity she'll tell me. We have a good time.


Then, at the storage unit her and I rehearse songs. I come up with a new melody on guitar and we chime in appropriately with oo's and ah's. Us singing like this gives me a wonderful feeling.

Back home. Ana went back to Norfolk.

Fried Chicken. Bok Choy, Mushrooms, Onions, and Spaghetti Noodles.

Watching Born on the Fourth of July (1989).

Josh and Sasha's room is the new living room. They've got some old typewriter. Richie's click-clacking away at it. He hands over the finished ramblings, "Here ya go, boss!"

Me: "It's about time! Get me rewrite!"

Richie's Rewrite Ramblings (Sept 25 2013)[ii]

I decide it's high time I went dumpster diving at Trader Joe's. Sasha tags along. She said she's never been diving before. We couldn't have picked a better night. I lug back crates of apples, hummus, bananas, tea, oranges, bagels, and cleaner. While cleaning up the produce in the kitchen we discover a perfect looking apple, the archetype apple.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Sleep 5:30 a.m.

[i] Archetype Apple. Image by me. 
[ii] Richie's Rewrite Ramblings.

Tuesday September 24 2013

Ann Pennington.[i]

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Vegan Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.

All day shift at China Wok.

It's expectedly dead at the restaurant. I take to scrubbing a few sinks in the back.

Five Guys French Fries with Ketchup. Honey Green Tea.

As of late I've been developing an unhealthy addiction to Kinder Chocolate Bars.

Later in the day I eat an apple. Then I realize I can develop a healthy addiction to these Fuji Apples.

Surprisingly, the business picks up dramatically at dinnertime. I'm the only driver and that means I can reap all the delivery benefits without the competition. But it also means I have to be a super driver. And so I am.

Ana arrives within the last hour of my shift and tags along. We sit down at the table and enjoy Vegetable Moo Shu with Broccoli.

30 orders delivered today and $116 in tips. With only 18 orders and $60 made in tips yesterday, I feel well rewarded.

Wallowing around in the bed Ana and I talk. I bring up the topic of her choice to wear makeup on her face. I didn't mean to insult but she becomes slightly offended and walks over to her "corner" by the clothes hamper.

Me: "I just want to be able to kiss you more there."

She mentions her behavior trait of being uncomfortable to discuss every personal detail with someone whom she has romantic interest in. With other friends it's doesn't even phase her. She hides over by the bedroom door. I keep my gaze on her behind the whirring fan.

Me: "Well are you afraid of rejection? Most people are. You shouldn't be. You have nothing to worry about. I like you."

Eventually she returns to the bed. We finish watching Django Unchained (2012). Then off to sleep at 4 a.m.

[i] Ann Pennington.

Monday September 23 2013

Rat at China Wok (Sept 23 2013)[i]

☼ ○ ▬

I sneak into a Lowe's warehouse store. It's understood that it's closed but as soon as I jump behind the counter to steal something the lights flicker on. Apparently, it's open now because I spot customers strolling around with shopping carts. I'm with three other people, Darren, Sasha, and a guy I don't recognize. We sit down at a café area. I attempt to cut a piece of thin cardboard on the table using a box cutter.

The guy I don't recognize protests, "You're doing it all wrong! Use the red line."

I retort, "There is no red line! Just watch. I'll do it right."

Darren interjects, "Don't treat me like a second rate honey bag!"

The lady sitting at the table over from us laughs. It doesn't make any sense what Darren said but within this dream scene it's understood to be clever.

He adds, "I ain't no Nefari."

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up at 11 a.m.

Instant Oatmeal. Coffee with Brown Sugar and Irish Cream.

All day shift at China Wok.

The fire inspector is here to make sure the restaurant's hoods and vents are being cleaned on a regular basis, and that we have all the extinguishers in working order. Cecily talks with the inspector up at the counter. While I'm bagging the fried noodles at the expediting counter I notice something brush by my leg. It looked like a tail. I check under the fridge and there he is, his tiny black eye staring right at me with fear. I make it known to Cecily and Ming. We try to trap him but he escapes behind the freezer. With some maneuvering we manage to get him out. Ming is adamant about swatting him heavily with the broom. I can't stop it. I would have preferred to catch the thing and free him outside. But they seem to think it'd be too difficult to catch. I sweep him up into the dustpan. He's still breathing and in a vegetative state. Nothing about this feels good. He's not going to survive. I can't just leave him like this. The damage has already been done and he's going to die a slow death. It would be tortuous for him if I just let him lie out here by the dumpster in pain. As violent as it may seem I take a brick to his head, putting him out of his misery. What else could I do? A hint of blackness sinks into my heart. 

PB&J. Salt n Vinegar Chips. Strawberry Kombucha Tea.

September has been a very slow month for business. Today has to be the worst of it. Ling is sitting by the computer snacking on Oreo's and I'm sitting at my computer reading an article about a community raping in Bolivia.


The nighttime deliveries don't get any better.

Chowing down on Sasha's Homemade Stew with Rice.

Leslie stops in to visit. She insists on playing Hangman. While in the car I mention my thoughts on seeking out a new career. I feel I could be making more money doing something else using my skill set. I consider teaching piano lessons again, something I did very well a long time ago.

Back home.

Pumpkin Toaster Pastries. Kinder Chocolate. Milk.

Kevin's having a Twilight Zone viewing in his room.

At the storage unit practicing songs.

Watching After Earth (2013).

Sleep 4:30 a.m.

[i] Image by me.

Sunday September 22 2013

There WIll Be Blood. Dave MacDowell.[i]

Waking up at 11:41 a.m.

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Vegan Cream Cheese. Orange Juice. Papaya.

All day shift at China Wok.

Ana had texted me last night with, "I just want to say that I'm reaaaaaaally happy to have youuuu in my life!!!! < 3 You're still the sweetest."

I respond with, "I just want to say you fill me up with so much positive energy. You're the sweetest."

Ana: "Waking up to that this morning added more brightness to my day! I only want to fill you up with positivity! I have a lot of it, and I will continue to keep sharing it with youuu! :D"

For lunch: Sasha's Homemade Stew with Potato Bread. Kinder Chocolate.

Football Sundays bring business for delivery guys. I would say 7 out of 10 customers I deliver to are watching the game.

Banana. Strawberry Kombucha Tea.

I get through the night with hope and determination.

Off work and back home at a reasonable time, 10:30.

Egg Vegetable Fried Rice. Kinder Chocolate.

Watching There Will Be Blood (2007).

Kevin's downstairs with an exceptionally "high" face. He always gives me a hard time when I go on these late-night physical outings by myself.

Me: "Hey Kevin, guess what I'm about to do at 3 in the morning?"


Taking a jog around the neighborhood with basketball in hand – practicing ball handling in the street.

Sipping on a fall ale.

Sleep 4:30 a.m.

[i] There Will Be Blood. Dave MacDowell.

Saturday September 21 2013

Alan Bean.[i]

Waking up at 11 a.m.

Starting my day off with a bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats with Brown Sugar and Milk.

All day shift at China Wok.

A customer calls from the Flagship hotel. She ordered yesterday. I remember her being super nice and well mannered. But she calls to complain about her chicken teriyaki on a stick. She claims it looked like beef teriyaki. She wants to order again and return the beef for the chicken. Fair enough. But Ling is real adamant on not remaking the chicken teriyaki because he's convinced he made it right and that the customer just isn't educated enough to know the difference between beef teriyaki and chicken teriyaki. I feel like the middleman because I have no power to do much of anything. I just translate what my boss says to her.

She reacts appropriately, "Well tell him he's not God! And that he's human. And humans make mistakes."

She doesn't want to place the order anymore and hangs up. Normally, I wouldn't let it bother me when a customer can't have their way. But this lady was reasonable. She deserved better service.

Toasted PB&J. Pretzel Thins. Honey Oolong Tea.

As soon as the thought crosses my mind, hmm it hasn't rained in a while, within 20 minutes it starts pouring.

Kinder Chocolate.

It's unusually slow for a Saturday.


Just getting through it.

Hot and Sour Soup.


I find a few people gathered around the black card table instead of our sturdy wooden table, which was destroyed last night.

Broccoli and Rice.

Watching Apollo 18 (2011).

Chores. Putting the pictures back on the wall that fell off from last night's destruction.


Popcorn and Beer.

The kids went out on the town, and by that I mean down the street to The Office for drinking and fuel for mayhem. When they arrive, I hear a quick squealing sound coming from Kevin's room. A firework went off. No amount of reprimanding will suffice. There will always be a justification for chaos. One day they'll grow up, but probably not.

Sleep around 4:30 a.m.

[i] Alan Bean.

Friday September 20 2013

Days of Thunder. 1990.[i]

Waking up at 10:50 a.m. about ten minutes before the alarm goes off. Feeling a mild hangover from that rice wine I had last night.

Blueberry Bagel with Vegan Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.

All day shift at China Wok.

A beautiful day outside.

Slow. Slow. Slow. Taking care of in-restaurant chores: snapping a box of snow peas, prepping the bags and fried noodles. 

Grilled Cheese with Hummus and Tomato. Pretzel Slims with Hummus. Honey Oolong Tea.

The day continues. Orders pick up. Luckily, I'm the only driver tonight, which means I can reap all the benefits.


Kinder Chocolate.


Keep going. Keep going. I get stuck delivering a little later than usual. Whatever. I take it like a man.

Tofu with Broccoli, Carrots, Onions, and Rice in Garlic Sauce.

Watching Days of Thunder (1990).

There's a chaotic commotion downstairs – people yelling and shouting songs, banging and breaking their surroundings. I put on my headphones to drown out the noise so I can focus and sink deep within.

Ana calls me on the phone. It's just about 2 a.m. She's on her way home.

Her: "I like to talk when I'm driving home."

Me: "My mom does the same thing actually. She calls me when she's driving home."

It's quiet downstairs suddenly. I assess the damages. Our sturdy wooden table is gone. Some pictures have fallen off the walls and in place of where they were are clever off-handed statements written in black marker. It seems somebody cleaned and picked up though. I decide not to put any energy redecorating and reconstructing. I should go to bed.

Sleep 4 a.m.

[i] Days of Thunder. 1990.

Thursday September 19 2013

Wave (Skull). James Jean.[i]

☼ ○ ▬

My bed is affixed to a ledge on the highest story of a skyscraper without any support bars underneath. It's just magically in tact on a windowsill. This is where I am to sleep tonight. Ana lies on top of me, her back to my chest and her head just below my chin. The fear of falling weighs heavy on our minds but we have no choice; we must be here. We watch this suspenseful movie sequence on a big-screen TV displayed on the skyscraper wall: a camera zooms away from a cityscape set in the present time, zoom increasing in speed as we drift further and further away from the earth. It's a wild sight. Ana and I are mesmerized. Then, in the same manner the camera zooms back in. It's assumed many centuries have passed. We've time traveled into the future. Everything's changed. No sign of human life. As the camera enters into a regal room we are introduced to a few lightening flashes and appearances of giant cyborg-like skulls. It's understood earth is now Hell. Into another room we see gloomy stop-motion characters, similar to The Corpse Bride.

I joke with Ana, "So Tim Burton takes over the world?"

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up shortly after 1:30 p.m.

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Honey Goat Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.


PB&J. Salt n Vinegar Chips. Honey Oolong Tea. Banana.

At the storage unit around 5 p.m. Practicing some songs on piano and guitar. Refreshing myself with material for a show coming up next weekend. My body tells me it's time to go to the bathroom. Unfortunately, there are no restroom facilities here at the storage complex. If I had to take care of #1 then I just relieve myself outside in the grass, no problem. Because I'm not ready to go home nor do I feel like leaving, I take a plastic bag and line the inside of a small tom drum to take care of business.


Somebody made Vegetarian Chili for the whole house. I prepare a bowl with Couscous and a Bagel, which I found in the toaster oven, forgotten by Laron, something he tends to do.

Ana arrives. Sasha is fixing up some big stew in the kitchen.

Ana and I retreat to the storage unit with intention to practice some songs together. I refrain from turning on the bright lights and keep a caramel scented candle lit. It's slightly cool outside and inside. We cuddle on the futon. I've been thinking about this moment all day. After providing her with some extra special attention and caresses the intimacy shifts in a sexual direction. Using the stool, chair, and pillows as props. A lone cricket serenades and sings for us as we dance in the quiet dark space. When we're done I pick up the guitar and we sing for ourselves. It's an enjoyable music time.

Back home. Sasha finished making her stew. She takes it upon herself to scrub the entire stove and clean the kitchen. Kevin's here, and high I might add, and offers a helping hand while he chats away in his overpowering clowny voice.

I mention to Sasha, "It's nice to have a female presence in this house so I'm not doing all the cleaning."

Kevin chimes in with a mannish girly voice, "Why thank you, Robert."

Upstairs, I share the first hour of Django Unchained with Ana while snacking on Popcorn and homemade Rice Wine.

Sleep around 4:30 a.m.

[i] Wave (Skull). James Jean.

Wednesday September 18 2013

Django Unchained. Illustration by Felipe Sanchez.[i]

Waking up later than I wanted shortly after 2 p.m.

Blueberry Bagel with Honey Goat Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.

Text from Ana: "I think about you a lot in between the days we hang out. We have a lot of space in between us. I have noticed that it has increased recently."

It's a beautiful day in the town of Chanticleer, a perfect day to rotate my tires.

Trail Mix. Papaya. Pretzel Thins with Peanut Butter. Cranberry Juice.

Watching Django Unchained (2012).


Music at the storage unit with Calum and Josiah.

Ramen with Mushrooms, Carrots, Bok Choy, and an Egg.

Watching Django Unchained (2012).

It's slightly chilly out tonight and the moon is brighter than a streetlight. I take my bike to the basketball courts off First Colonial and shoot around for a little bit. The tightness in my calf has mostly gone away.

Back home. I make a brief racket putting my chrome spray painted rims back on my car. Kevin comes outside.

Kevin: "It's 3 in the morning, Robert, and you're working on your car."

Me: "Yes Kevin. So what?"

Kevin: "You're weird."

Honey Bunches of Oats with Brown Sugar and Milk.

Sleep 5 a.m.

[i] Django Unchained. Illustration by Felipe Sanchez.

Tuesday September 17 2013

Under the Rudee Bridge (Sept 17 2013)[i]

Waking up around 1 p.m.

Sasha shuffles her fingers on my bedroom door to give me the rent money.

Her: "How were your dreams?"

Me: "Oh. I remember playing basketball. That was about it."

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Honey Goat Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.

Editing drums on Ableton.

The sweetest and freshest Papaya, Trail Mix, Salt n Vinegar Chips.

Watching Flight (2012).


At the storage unit practicing and recording drums.

Salmon, Bok Choy, Onions, Carrots, Mushrooms, Tomatoes, and Couscous.

While cleaning the dishes Kevin recounts some of the awkward inner-family China Wok disputes from his work shift.

Off on my bike...again. This is becoming a habit worth keeping. Zipping south on the boardwalk letting my iPod tunes lead me on a transcendent hazy oceanfront adventure. Thoughts dancing wildly – attached to the beach city surroundings. Under the Rudee Bridge someone spray-painted in big letters a Ben Franklin quote. He spelt the word "lose" wrong but his intentions were good. "Any society willing to surrender a little liberty to gain a little security deserves neither and will lose both."

Honey Bunches of Oats with Brown Sugar and Milk.

Sleep 5 a.m.

[i] Image by me.

Monday September 16 2013

Kmoore's Solace on the Beach (Sept 16 2013)[i]

Waking up real late around 2:30 p.m. I guess I needed the extra sleep.

I find out a Brazilian beauty company used a song of mine in a commercial, an acoustic redux of a Tokyo song...

A bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats with Brown Sugar and Milk.


Lifting weights and doing crunches.

Grilled Cheese on a Bagel with Tomato and Hummus.

Watching The Ledge (2011).

Full court 5-on-5 basketball near Lynnhaven Middle School. Every Monday these courts are exploding with testosterone. I get a nice jumper shot during the beginning of the first game but after that it's downhill. Everyone has to compensate for the wind. I get knocked in my right leg pretty hard, directly into my calf.

At the storage unit recording some Vaginasaurs drums.

Super Spinach Salad with Japanese Style Rice, Chic Peas, and Edamame.

Bike adventures with Josh, Sasha, and Kevin. The winding of my legs on the bike doesn't seem to agitate my limp. The wind is strong and keeps us a flight as we soar down the boardwalk. There's a lot of discussion over the course of the ride. Recapping road trip stories ... "Richie is a mystery." ... Streetlight interference phenomenon ( ... the rise of real-life super heroes (

Sasha & Josh (Sept 16 2013)

Back home. Getting lost in research, one topic and current event after the other.

Sleep at 5:30 a.m.

[i] All images by me.

Sunday September 15 2013

Bulldog with Tiger. Source unknown.[i]

Waking up around 11:30 a.m. Ana insists on embracing me at least three times before she leaves and baby-kissing me on the neck. <3


All day shift at China Wok.

Moe is working at Five Guys. He says I just missed the lunch rush and gives me some extra fries. I don't really need more but okay.

Five Guys French Fries with Ketchup. Honey Green Tea.

Business is steady as Sundays typically are.

I come across a tiger-coated bulldog on a delivery.

Off work and back home.

Vegetable Egg Moo Shu.

Watching The Colony (2013), a low-grade post-apocalyptic movie.


Sleep 3:30 a.m.

[i] Bulldog with Tiger Cub. Source unknown.

Saturday September 14 2013

Rider Kmoore (Sept 14 2013)[i]

☼ ○ ▬

On the clock at China Wok. Frustrated at work. Delivering to unprofitable customers. Dealing with some of the same frustrations I was dealing with yesterday in waking life. I recall half waking up and being disappointed with the dream. Later, after delivering somewhere, I spark a love affair with a handicapped girl; maybe she's autistic. Everything is consensual but she's constantly feeling these spurts of pain every ten minutes on certain parts of her body making it difficult for us to have sex. We're trying to hide our relationship from her brother who is this macho homeboy with a fixation for hip-hop. We convince him we're just rehearsing a dance routine for school.

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up at 11 a.m.

Strawberry Toaster Pastries. Orange Juice.

All day shift at China Wok.

A black dude just ordered spare rib tips and is waiting at a table. He commands his phone to call somebody, "Call Shania."

Apparently the phone called another girl he didn't want it to. He mutters to himself, "Don't call that bitch! Shit."

He fumbles with the touch pad trying to undo the call.

Peanut Butter Bagel. Pretzel Slims with Hummus. Honey Green Tea.

The day continues in a blur.


Delivering an order off Harper's Road. Three little girls answer the front door. The youngest one screams at the top of her lungs when she sees me, in a playful way. She continues in spurts. Does she even realize how deafening her voice is?

Tofu with Broccoli, Carrots, Onions, and Rice in Garlic Sauce.

Ana tags along on the last hour of my shift.

Her: "I thought about cutting my hair today."

Me: "What? You think that's the root of all your problems?"

Her: "I think my life would be easier."

Back home. Ana bakes up something special in the kitchen. Darren walks in unannounced. He was in town just for the day. He offers me a big hug and slap on the back. We haven't seen this character in over a month. Kevin buys a 24-pack of PBR's and we reconnect as a 1435 family. Ana finishes the Chocolate Chip Cupcakes, which turn out delicious despite her mild disappointment. I try to reassure her these are perfect. Darren talks about how great him and Devon are living up in Radford in comparison to the chaos here at 1435...

"Dude, I vacuum every other day. I come home and all the pictures on the wall are still in tact."


I convince Kevin, Darren, and Ana to ride bikes down to the oceanfront. There's a wonderful pre-autumn chill in the air. Kevin wears his brown leather jacket with the American flag on it. Darren wears his classic black leather jacket. Ana's strutting a smooth black and white motorcycle-looking jacket. And I've got on a thin red and white hoodie. We look good together adventuring and chatting.   

Down near Grommet Island we discover a dead bat on the ground. A fellow bat, possibly a friend, was either mourning for him or feeding off his remains.

Grommet the Bat (Sept 14 2013)

In the middle of all the excitement Darren admits something heartfelt...
"You know? I really missed you guys!"


I lead us all to the middle school across the street from Elliott's on 16th Street. Throwing the playground ball around – dunking – Foursquare – Wall Ball. At some point the ball gets kicked up onto the roof of the school. I don't hesitate to find a way to climb up there and retrieve it.

Finite Shadows (Sept 14 2013)

Back home. Settling down.

Sleep shortly after 4 a.m.

[i] All images by me.

Friday September 13 2013

Matroyshka Theremin[i]

Waking up around 11 a.m.

Strawberry Toaster Pastries. Orange Juice.

All day shift at China Wok.

Slow day at work.

Cinnamon Raisin Bagel with Honey Goat Cream Cheese. Potato Chips. Honey Green Tea.

I'm feeling blasé as I deal with the typical tragedies of a delivery driver – listening to 790AM talk radio about American exceptionalism.

Banana. Ginger Chews.

Steve comes in to help with the dinner shift. I get stuck with mediocre tips and minimal orders while he steals my potential moneymaking orders. I'm just frustrated. 

Finally off work and back home.

Fried Chicken with Snow Peas, Onions, Carrots, Broccoli, and Rice in Garlic Sauce.

Watching Parker (2013).

"When I enter into an agreement with someone, terms on both sides have to be honored. If they're not, and I allow that, I'm asking chaos to take control of my life. Nobody likes chaos."

"Love Me Tender" played by a Matroyshka Theremin

Chocolate Chip Cookies with Milk.

Sleep at a decent hour.

[i] Matroyshka Theremin.

Thursday September 12 2013

Ana's Journal (11.25am Sept 12 2013)z[i]

☼ ○ ▬

Hanging out with my mom and dad in North Carolina. It doesn't feel like the present time, maybe at some point before I was born. They start yelling and arguing. I find out information about them that I never knew. In waking life my mom didn't have the chance to go to college. But here I find out she attended one year at Yale to be a doctor.

Me: "Yale? You went to Yale?"

It's almost as if they have time traveled here with me too. They're both aware of the unreality. I look over documents from Yale that are sitting on top of the microwave. My dad also worked for some huge corporation overseas. Later, I reconvene with my dad outside on the roof of this skyscraper. It's pouring down rain. We locate a spot under an awning and look out across the big metropolis city in a wow-like moment. A few foreign girls that are understood to be aspiring nurses approach me. One of them takes a liking to me. A romantic bond is formed. I feel guilty because it's understood Ana is in the house. Later, conducting a convention inside a grocery store. I encourage a friend to impersonate Michael Jackson on stage to entertain the masses. Everything seems to be going well. The audience is laughing. 

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up at 2:09 p.m.

Downstairs Ana and I share Bagels with Honey Goat Cream Cheese and Orange Juice. Kofi's here playing the piano. I offer the other half of Ana's bagel.

Kofi: "This tastes like ribs!"

Me: "Ribs? Ribs, Kofi?"

It's hot, hot, hot in this house. A/C has never worked properly in Chanticleer. Letting the fans cool us down. Surprisingly Ana actually lets me see some entries in her journal sketch book. She still gets embarrassed at some of the more personal observations...

"I noticed how bossy he was, but I think it's good he's like that when it comes to practicing. I get it. So practice. That's it. It's simple. But...I was feeling very discouraged by this negative impatient energy he was giving off …………………… I felt closed off and I was quiet. That feeling of giving up on this 'thing' between us came in a little as we made our way to Wawa so we could get gas. He was very sweet and gave me some kisses when we got there. It was very relieving. I'm lucky that he's patient and good to me."

She leaves.

Strawberry Greek Yogurt with Peaches and Cantaloupe.

Trail Mix. Potato Chips. Honey Green Tea.

At the storage unit practicing with Calum and Josiah. Solidifying a new song.

Back home. Eating some Penne Pasta with Red Beans Kofi left on the stove. Adding a Kale and Edamame Salad.

I convince Kofi to ride bikes with me to the beach. We meet up with Elliott and Michelle on 16th. Cruising the boardwalk down to Grommet Island and back. Then, at the middle school across the street from Elliott's house. There's a basketball court with a pair of hoops hanging low enough for us to easily dunk the playground ball. Living the dream.

Night Riders (Sept 12 2013)[ii]

Slam Dunk (Sept 12 2013)

Back home. Slurping up a few bowls of cereal: Honey Bunches of Oats with Brown Sugar and Milk.

Watching Now You See Me (2013).

I'd like to quote a review I read on IMDB by "user-226-297891":

"This is a brand of cinema one could call 'pretentious' and 'farcical' at the same time. The entire movie seems like it is smugly smirking at the audience with sporadic 'gotcha!' or 'I'm so philosophical and esoteric' moments when in reality it is nothing but a juvenile and convoluted plot put together with paper thin characters, hackneyed lines, an astoundingly insipid narrative and an amateur mix of mumbo jumbo with magic tropes. Looking at the pedigree of the actors involved, this is a tragic waste of their talent."

Sleep just before 5 a.m.  

[i] Ana's journal. 
[ii] Images by me.

Wednesday September 11 2013


Waking up just before 1 p.m.

I have a lunch date with my ex-girlfriend, Margot, at Baker's Crust. A few days ago she asked to do this. There are no intentions or hidden agendas to rekindle anything. It's just a brief catch-up. I order the Tuna Salad Sandwich with their Homemade Chips. She informs me on her latest boy ventures and some iPhone app that helps sort of match-make you with locals. She hasn't changed much, still keeping her nightlife strong. Still naïve. Still beautiful. I update her on the things going on in my life. She goes into detail with this guy she's been seeing for the past week. I'm not much interested in the details. But she seems happy and satisfied with everything. We talk about the dangers of getting into the rut of meeting a variety of people for short periods of time and then moving on so quickly.


Outside in the Hilltop parking lot. It's one of the hottest days. Mingling for a little bit and hugging each other goodbye.

Her: "See you later."

Me: "Okay. See you around."

Sipping on Honey Green Tea and doing some chores.

At the storage unit tracking more drum tracks for Vaginasaurs.

Then, at the basketball courts playing a boring game of 21 with four street baller brothers.

At the house. Bobby picked up two other Bulgarian couch surfers from the bus station, Marina and Stella. After inspecting the extensive decorations on the walls one of the girls comments, "I feel like I'm in a museum."

Me: "Well the admission is free!"

Talking with them in the living room about conspiracies and heightened security in America (in light of the 9-11 anniversary).

Kale, Edamame, and Tomato Salad. Sicilian Style Pizza.

Richie's in the dining room completing his mural on a kick drum. Laron and Kevin eventually show up.

Then Ana arrives. I take her to the storage unit to teach her a Vaginasaurs song. It's apparent she's an amateur guitar player. It's just not an instrument she's proficient at like she is at the piano. I know this. She knows this. But she's the kind of person who is determined and likes to learn new things. I notice how impatient I get when teaching. I don't mean to be and I try to play it off sarcastically.


We leave. I stop for gas at the Wawa. I can tell she's discouraged and closed up. Before I get out to pump the gas I reach over and smother her with a few kisses. It seems to perk her up a bit.

Back home.

Laron walks in while we're fixing up our iced lemon waters and asks, "What's crack-a-lackin guys?"

I turn around with an ice cube and slam it on the floor causing the cube to crack into pieces. "That's what's crack-a-lackin, Laron!"

Laron: "Whoa!"

Me: "It's onomatopoeia."

He looks at Ana and adds, "You mean ANA-matopoeia."

In my bedroom I share The Place Beyond the Pines (2012) with Ana. Snacking on Popcorn and Peaches.

Sleep at 6 a.m.?

[i] The Place Beyond the Pines logo.