Saturday June 2 2012


Sometime around 9 a.m. I’m awoken to Kristin’s restlessness once again. She just wants to touch and pamper me. Sparse sleep here and there until it’s closer to 11 a.m.


Her: “I don’t like that I like you so much.”

Apricots. Orange Peach Mango Juice.

All day shift at China Wok.

Steady as she goes.

Scrambled Egg with Tomato. Five Guys French Fries. Honey Green Tea.

Contemplating on the progression between Kristin and I. There’s still no pressure to lock into something exclusive just yet but I do feel an uneasy resistance on my end. I don’t want to admit that she might be scaring me away with her insecurities (the red flags). And I don’t think that’s the entire reason because I do sense a ton of empathy and sincerity in her. I could see her being a great lover and good girlfriend. However, I predict getting more and more apprehensive, and her pushing more and more. She’s super sweet and adorable. And I’ve already revealed enough about myself to hook her. The problem is I might be feeling the need to stay alone and date around as necessary. But I’ll continue to ride this out cause it feels right.


Thinking more about it, she’s somewhat of a novelty to me. She represents a gothic aesthetic I used to fantasize about, and I don’t just mean sexually. Like in an Addams Family sort of way. Maybe this has to do with my crush on Christina Ricci growing up, not that Kristin looks like her. I appreciate her spunkiness and spookiness.

The day continues.

Vegan Chocolate Chip Cookies.

It’s busy just enough to make money and not an order too much. Smooth. I believe smooth is the best word to describe today. All the deliveries are close by and without complications. I only have to snap the peas on one side because the other side is already snipped. The weather is fresh and springy. Everything about these waking hours has been a smooth ride.

Off work and back home.

James Graves brought a guy friend over. Kevin, Richie, Don, and Jenji are here. I plop down on the couch with my dinner and we entertain ourselves with Independence Day (1996).

Tofu with Broccoli, Snow Peas, Onions, and Rice in Garlic Sauce.

Settling down in my room. Need to catch up on rest. Watching a little bit of The Addams Family (1991).

Sleep at 3 a.m.

[i] Christina Ricci. Image source unidentified.

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