Wednesday May 16 2012


☼ ○ ▬

It’s late at night around one in the morning. Earlier I tried to visit Joanne Truitt at her apartment, as well as another guy across the hall. I was ridiculed for assuming it was okay to just show up and expect to have a place to sleep. It’s understood that my personal living situation is not very pleasant so I try to stay away from it as much as possible.

It’s the next day and I confront Joanne in the parking lot. She looks burdened and seems to be harboring a lot of pain over something.

Me: “Sorry I was a little intrusive last night.”

I’m carrying a house phone of some kind and wearing iPod headphones. I keep hearing an annoying notification beep in my ear. *BOOP* I assume I’ve missed a call and so the phone is trying to inform me. *BOOP* But even after pulling out the ear buds the beep continues. *BOOP* To my dismay the phone isn’t causing it and seems to be in my head. The pitch is a tone between F# and G at 190 Hz. It’s quite disturbing because I want to give all my attention to what’s going on with Joanne. I keep trying to talk to her despite. *BOOP* I notice a tear run down her cheek.

Me: “C’mon. You need a hug.”

All of a sudden she realizes she’s late for work and dashes to her car, but it’s parked behind an entrapment of other cars and she’s not going anywhere. I wish I could help. *BOOP*

▬ ○ ☼ ○ ▬

Sitting down at a booth with one of the delivery drivers I work with at China Wok. The guy just recently broke up with his girlfriend and is now involved in some weird bestiality relationship. He’s dating a cat. I don’t judge him but ask a few questions... 

Me: “I’m curious, how is it different...the affection you share with him, how does it differ from something else?”

He answers with a complete explanation as if he fully understands the philosophy of dating a cat. He’s holding a white cardboard box. I lift open the flaps carefully and find his lover cat sleeping. The cat slowly opens her eyes (it’s understood to be female) and stretches out her paws. I’m amazed at the colorful sheen of her fur coat, which resembles a painting. I walk back towards the front of the building – a lot of people packed in here. It’s understood to be a police station. I step into the foyer where I converse with Megan Stamper for a few minutes.

Her: “They’re finally going to let us go.”

Someone compliments the knitted sequin gloves I have on, “Look, he’s got diamonds on his gloves!”

Me: “They’re not real diamonds.”

Megan’s friend starts speaking Spanish to her and I head back into the crowd of people in the hallway.  

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up at 1 p.m.

Iced Oatmeal Breakfast Bars. Orange Juice.

Clearing out the last of my stuff at my old storage unit in its entirety. Transporting it into the new spot. Josiah’s already there tracking some guitar tracks. The sky is dark and cloudy – rain falls down in bucketfuls.

Double Egg Sandwich with Mayonnaise and Tomato. Potato Chip Trio. Honey Green Tea.

Learning this Headphones song on piano – hoping to cover it at the next Show n Tell.

James comes over after just working out and practices his charcoal drawing on newspaper. I make dinner...

Barbecue Salmon with Onions, Mushrooms, Spinach, and Rice.

Then join him at the card table concocting my own marker art...

Darren and Devon stroll in after drinking at The Office.

Then, Calum shows up and it’s down to just me, him, and Darren philosophizing, criticizing, and debating on the downfalls of humanity, but more specifically Americanism. It’s difficult to imagine any sort of hope around Darren. As much as his view of the world is based on facts and research and education, it is overwhelmingly bleak and hard to stomach being around this kind of talk 24/7. He’s a supporter of defeatism to which I am not. There’s a certain amount of acceptance (not ignorance) one must have to face the darkness of a lost world with. I choose to be as productive as possible by edifying the people around me as much as I can and instilling truth/love/hope wherever it is needed.

Peanut Butter and Cookie Butter Bagel.

Watching Drive (2011).

Sleep around 4 a.m. 

[i] Marker art by me.

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