[i]
☼ ○ ▬
My death has been announced. But it’s understood clearly
that when I die my spirit will be allowed to roam around just like my body
would with all my senses in tact, however no one will be able to see me. I’m
lying there in a makeshift coffin, the lid propped open, hovering above my
lifeless shell. Next to me is Thomas Jefferson. He gives me the rundown as
apparently he’s still been roaming the earth since he died. I arise. Picking
through a container of thick green leaves to feed a strange breed of koalas
behind a fenced in field. I reach out my hand. One of them nibbles on the leaf
I’m holding. The edge of the ocean. Various animals swimming below me. Horses.
Dogs. A black dog. I reach out my hand to rub his head affectionately. It
accepts the gesture.
▬ ○ ☼ ○ ▬
My mother has died suddenly. I become enraged as I walk into
what’s understood to be my house. Yelling and throwing a ceramic owl across the
room. Trying to compose myself. Later I find out she did not pass yet and she’s
being revitalized by a doctor. I see into the living room and there she is on a
hospital bed. I’m relieved.
▬ ○ ☼
Waking up at 1:11 p.m.
Plums. Orange Juice.
Anthony gives me a ride to my car. When casually debating on
the most direct route he exclaims, “Everyone’s right in their own way and wrong
in someone else’s.”
Errands.
Grilled Cheese with Tomato. Five Guys French Fries.
Pomegranate Ade.
Watching The Experiment (2010).
Learning some Russian.
Adventures in Norfolk. First on the itinerary is the seven
o’clock viewing of Beasts of the Southern Wild (2012). Josh and his
girlfriend Sierra, Anthony, Kristin, Jonathon, and Allison are present.
Whimsical, lyrical, raw, and dreamy are everything that this film is. Where
the Wild Things Are set in the southern tip of Louisiana. It’s beautiful.
...
Quick stop at Wesley and Ian’s apartment. The opening
ceremonies of the Olympics are on TV. Sipping on a PBR and eating a Swiss Milk
Chocolate Bar with Hazelnuts. I’m picked on by Kristin for packing snacks in my
backpack.
...
I start up a mini rant related to maintenance on my car,
“It’s such a slow process for anything. It’s crazy how many weeks go by, go by,
go by, and nothing gets done. I feel really unequipped. If I had it my way I’d
do it right now. But no, I have to depend on OTHER people. I have to trust
OTHER people. I don’t wanna depend on other people anymore. Done. Done.”
Anthony: “That was the final line of Pete & Pete,
last episode.”
Me: “No it wasn’t.”
Anthony: “How do you know? Prove it, asshole.”
Me: “I’ll look it up. I have a smart phone.”
Anthony: “I bet you could not find the last line of the last
episode of Pete & Pete online.”
And here’s what I found: “So that's the story of our
ordinary Saturday. If you look at it one way you might think it was a day we'd
wanna forget. Look at it another way and you’ll realize why it was a day we'd
always remember.”
...
Walking over to The New Belmont for Art After Dark, an art
show featuring Rachel’s and other’s artwork on display along with musical guests,
Will Huberdeau and Logan. I run into familiar faces. Kelly Ann Jackson, always
one of my favorite people to see in Norfolk.
Kelly: “So where are your friends at?”
Me: “Oh you know, out and about.”
Kelly: “Never leave home without them.”
[ii]
Sipping on a Blue Moon with an Orange Slice. Everyone
dancing to the bumbly tribal sounds of Logan. Enjoying the hazy atmosphere now
that I have a little alcohol in me.
[iii]
Carrying a toothpick that I picked up from the entrance.
Kristin notices and protests, “Stop being so Drive right now.”
...
Outside huddling together with people underneath the small
awning and sharing cloves.
Kristin: “I feel like my lungs are shriveling up into black
masses!”
...
Then to Donut Dinette. Anthony, Kelley, Jonathon, Tristan,
Leisa, Allison and a guy friend of hers are present.
Two Donuts. Salmon Cake. Fried Green Tomatoes.
The people that parked in front of us left their lights on
for two hours. Leisa happened to have jumper cables so we give it a try but after
fifteen minutes of running our car we realize it’s something we can’t commit
to. But they call for other options. We apologize. I leave them with, “Don’t
worry. The nightmare will end. I promise.”
Finally back home.
Settling down.
Sleep 4 a.m.
[i] X-Ray Knit
Design. Carol Christian Poell.
[ii] Art After
Dark. Photo by Chloe Allen.
[iii] Other
images by me.
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