Monday July 26 2010

DREAM: Standing in the median surrounded by an interstate road. Earlier I had set up these blow-up numbers on metal rods to imitate a street sign. It’s supposed to be my own version of street art or some kind of culture jamming. The first number “9” isn’t standing properly. I try fixing it by turning it around and bending the metal rod. It’s very difficult. Some people ride by questioning out loud as to what I am doing. “It’s my art! And they’re numbers!” I finally fix it up decently enough to read the numbers.

Waking up at 3:20 p.m.

Breakfast: Toasted Whole Wheat Bagel with Butter and Raspberry Jam. Dynamo Juice.


I buy a watermelon from a guy selling them out of his pick up truck off Virginia Beach Blvd. He has a thick country accent. He assures me they’re the best watermelons around and that I will be back for more.

Trip to the bank, Big Lots, and Target.

Nic randomly pulls up as I’m walking inside. We walk around the store together and share our love for the cheap prices at Target. “You know…another reason Target is so great is all the pretty ladies here.”

Lunch: Egg Salad Sandwich with Lettuce and Tomato. Salt N Vinegar Chips. Mango Oolong Tea.

Rocky walks into my room. She found a crazy bug from outside she thinks Rachel will like.

Josiah walks into my room. He says he needs to clear his mind. Talking about his plans to go to New York.

Me: “What I want doesn’t coincide with what I feel.”

Practice at the storage unit with Chris. Working on new Musicplayer songs.

Slaving away cutting up watermelon and removing the seeds.

Emily and Wesley are on the couch. Chatting back and forth with them about how Facebook accidentally doesn’t invite the people you want to invite for events. This somehow forms into an argument between Emily and I. She leaves claiming I “need to get a fucking grip on reality.” Feeling a little helpless because it seems the more I inquire into her perspective and try to better understand her feelings, the more heightened her frustration becomes. And there is no possible way to have a calm debate or conversation when there is a disagreement. Maybe from now on it would be best to just keep my mouth shut. I believe Abraham Lincoln said it best, “It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one’s mouth and remove all doubt.”

Picking up Becca from her work then going to Waffle House.

Text message from her dad to her: “Enjoy it all.”

It’s unusually busy for a monday night and our waiter continuously forgets to put in our order and bring us our drinks. Eventually, he just offers our food free of charge.

Eating leftover Mushroom Chicken, which I zapped at the 7-11 across the street, a Salad and then a Waffle.

Me: “I like how everything’s kind of vague with you. [laughter] It’s like you never know what’s really going on.”

Becca: “Yuck Few.”

Becca: “Let’s say within this next year everyone you know here that keeps this area special and alive to you slowly, like, trickles out and leaves or moves somewhere else or just starts to hang out with other people, I don’t know. And you get the opportunity to move somewhere where you don’t know anybody, would you do it? And have Margot move with you? And, like, just you two. You don’t know anybody. So it’s not the drama of people that you know and, like, rumors and stuff.”

Me: “It’s definitely a solution but I don’t know if that would help.”

Alex shows up and joins us.

Discussing Inception.

Becca describes to us a few of her recent dreams.

At home. Downloading new music.

Shooting a few rounds of basketball on the courts nearby.

Eating some Watermelon and a small bowl of Frosted Blueberry Mini-Wheats.

Setting up stuff online.

On the phone with Margot talking about heavy and light topics but with no hostility.

Me: “You’re first response to anything is denial.”

Margot: “No.”

Sleep around 6:45 a.m.

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