Sunday April 15 2012


DREAM: A special wooden chest hidden in an old house deep in the forest. ☼ Walking through a mountain landscape. Someone with me is holding a mobile wide screen—filming the conversation and the scenery. We reach an interstate road. Cars swooping by. We’re trying to figure out where north is because that’s the direction we’re headed. Someone finds our car. I use my common sense and notice the sun is setting west of here showing that north is to the right of the sun. I align my arms appropriately in the air and announce my epiphany, “Guys! North is that way!” ☼ Flying high above the mountain terrain. I’m safely cooped up inside a black sports car with other friends. We have a mysterious understood cause. Slowly we fall...and slowly our vehicle comes apart piece by piece. We hold on to what we can grab. But there’s no fear. It’s a soft landing. It’s understood that this was done on purpose. People were watching. And soon there are news crews on site. Our story is unbelievable to the public. One reporter shoves a microphone in my direction for an interview. I speak with conviction...

Me: “C’mon! What year is it?” I actually wanted to know what year it was but turned it into a point on the empowerment of our era. “Take a look around you. Things are changing and you adapt a little but you have to break free!”

Getting out of bed at 11:30 a.m.

Instant Oatmeal with Coconut Milk. Immune Defense Drink. Strawberries.

All day shift at China Wok. It’s 72 degrees but the heat index makes it feel ten times hotter.


Snapping the peas.

Feeling unusually lethargic. Still sick. And my voice is weak and rasp.

Banana. Lemonade.

I really have no energy today. Where is my second wind?

The oceanfront is popping already. It’s only the second day of actual warm weather but the boardwalk is already saturated with locals and tourists.

Delivering an order to the Dolphin Run on 3rd street. I approach the customer’s door on the fourth floor but it’s already open. I see a short peppy brunette lady swing a piece of cloth against the wall. She recognizes I’m present. I notice she has a cute face.

“I’m not crazy,” she says trying to squelch any assumptions on my end.

Me: “Well, what are you doing?”

Her: “I had a party and left my porch door open. So now I have all these things flying around.”

She swats another time.

Me: “Yup. It’s bug season.”

She pulls me inside to show me the gravity of the situation.

Her: “Look.”
I look up at the ceiling to see a variety of summer bugs glued to the kitchen light.

Her: “Who are they?”

I try to give her some pointers like spraying bug spray or bleach. She seems really distressed by them. After a few minutes we finally make the Chinese food exchange. I’m off.

Me: “Good luck!”

Finally off work.

Hot and Sour Soup with Rice. Shrimp Egg Roll. Spring Rolls.

Fortune cookie: “Always accept yourself the way you are.”

[Text message]

Margot: “Still at work :) sleepover and sex tonight?”

Margot gets off work and relaxes with me in my bedroom. We converse about her day’s troubles and surprises. She’s very tired. I offer a little bit of affection but no further allowance on her end because she’s very tired. I joke about it...

Me: “I knew this would happen. I read that text of yours and just knew it. The ball’s in your court from now on.”

She drifts off to sleep as usual before me. And I finish downloading some music.

Sleep 3 a.m.

[i] Brent Hildy.

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