Saturday April 14 2012


DREAM: On tour. Loading in. We’ve got a few more hours till the show starts. I take a walk up the hill to another venue to check out another concert where I hear guitars and drums sound checking. I use my Mae All Access laminate to get through the back door where a man is checking passes. I take a seat on the steps of the bleachers. Raven is sitting next to me. We talk to each other like friends who see one another all the time. A strange normalcy. I notice an interesting piercing design on her neck she must’ve just got: 5 piercing points marking a curved line across her skin. She leaves to use the restroom and I dart up on the stage where The White Stripes are getting ready to perform. I approach Jack White and comment on the song he was just strumming.

Me: “That’s my favorite song.”

He kind of doesn’t hear me so I pump up my voice volume.

Me: “That’s my favorite song of yours!”

He doesn’t seem too shocked that I just barraged the stage and I’m also wondering why security didn’t stop me. I shake his hand and wish him luck for the show. I run back out—people staring at me now. I realize I’m wearing an all red outfit, so I probably come across as a White Stripes fanatic, which I’m not. I leave and begin long boarding downward on asphalt roadways towards the other venue, where I’m supposed to be at soon. Discovering new techniques of holding my balance—riding with the board sideways.

Getting out of her bed around 11 a.m. Head feeling heavy. Nose congested. Slightly sore throat. 72 degrees outside. It’s going to be a great day.

Hot White Green Tea with Lemon and Honey.

All day shift at China Wok.

Strawberries and Vanilla Yogurt. OJ.

Egg Sandwich with Tomato and Mayonnaise. Multi Grain Tortilla Chips with Fresh Guacamole. Pomegranate Cherry Ade.

The day my car...thoughts racing on the dead time while I drive.


Even though Margot and I have seen a ton of each other these past days it still bothers me that just a week ago she was hiding a mild interest in another. It feels like I have to pull her in again...the eternal tug-o-war...steal her heart again, not so much her heart I guess cause I still have that I know, but rather steal her time and attention...reel her back in...set her eyes directly on my eyes. But I really shouldn’t worry so much. I know she loves me deeply. Doubt can consume your mind greatly if you allow it to.

Goldfish. Aloe Vera Drink.

Delivering an order off Inlynnview to an upper class house. Two teenage boys conduct the transaction. Before shutting the door one of them adds randomly, “I can unicycle!” as if I was interested in his skills at all.

“Oh. Okay. That’s cool,” I reply.

As I’m reversing out of the driveway I hear, “Excuse me???”

I turn around to see both of the boys showing off their genuine unicycle abilities.

Me: “You weren’t kidding, were you?”

Off work. I meet up with Margot at her house. She had to open at her work and got stuck doing overtime, getting off right when I did.

Tofu and Mixed Vegetables in Garlic Sauce with Rice. PBR.

Fortune cookie: “The universe does not have laws—it has habits, and habits can be broken.”

Her roommate, Emily, is here with a friend of hers named Rob. We all lounge on the couch watching that hot tub time travel movie with John Cusack. Later I instigate some passionate making out with Margot. I was hoping to segueway into something more but she’s understandably exhausted and needs to prepare school stuff for tomorrow. I can be satisfied with her luscious lips only.

Back home.


Sleep 2:40 a.m.

[i] Hannah Stouffer.

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