Monday June 10 2013

Ho-Ryan Lee.[i]

☼ ○ ▬

At China Wok. For some reason my bed is set up in the corner of the restaurant near the front. I'm laying down for a break. Cecily, my boss, plops down next to me and lays her head on my chest in an endearing way. I wrap my arm around her body like it's normal. I feel a tingly warm sensation inside me because I'm excited that she feels this way. She pulls out a condom and insists that we have sex. As much as I'd like to I point out that Ling, her husband and chef, is in the kitchen and could spot us at any moment. "It's not a problem," she says. As much as I love the mutual attraction this sexual tension worries me. We don't end up doing anything. Later, we get kind of busy. The sexual attraction is still there but hidden. Cecily hands me two ice cream waffle cones tied to a string that I'm supposed to wear around my neck and deliver to a customer. I already knew this contraption wouldn't be a feasible way to keep the cones from breaking apart. When I hop into my car the cones crumble and the ice cream melts. I return, afraid that she'll be upset and short tempered about it as she usually is about anything. Where's that sweetness? I know there's a sweetness locked up inside her.

▬ ○ ☼

Getting out of bed at 11:07 a.m.

Blueberry Bagel with Cream Cheese. Orange Juice.

All day shift at China Wok.

Thinking into the dream. I know most of those sexual themes are correlated to Ana and having sex with her the night before but part of me wonders how successful I would be if I actually made a pass at my boss. She's only one year older than me. And there's obvious frustration and dullness in her marriage. Even Ling one time asked me about prostitutes and where he could find one in the city. He explained that sometimes a man just needs it. So it makes me question the happiness in their relationship. I mean they work together every day, EVERY DAY. And there's that whole propinquity thing in my favor. The close proximity of her and I at work creates a bed of possibilities. I mean I'm not really considering any kind of legitimate affair. It's all just a fantasy I guess you could say. But if she ever made a pass at me? I don't think I could turn it down.

Strawberry Greek Yogurt.

Ana texts me, "That really surprised me last night. For years I've been so used to shutting my body down sexually during my period, but I will definitely get used to it (like you said I should). Eheh. You're always so good to me. You're always surprising a good way. I can't help it that you naturally impress me. :)"

Bowtie Pesto with Lentils and Tomatoes. Lemon Water.

A tropical storm is brewing. For the rest of the night I'm swimming up to the customer's doors. The rain falls down in bucketfuls. Lightening strikes in the distance.

Dried Apricots.

Finally off work and back home.

Watching The Score (2001).

Hot and Sour Soup with Broccoli and Rice.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Sleep 4 a.m.

[i] Ho-Ryan Lee.

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