Sunday February 3 2013


☼ ○ ▬

With Kevin and James at an upscale dinner function. I leave the table and come back to find Kevin has pulled out my laptop, turned it on, and is using it. He changed all the settings and messed with almost all my configurations. I can’t even fathom how he figured out my log-on password. I’m very angry.

Me: “Kevin, what the fuck? This is not cool!”

He just casually smiles like he always does and justifies everything he does for the sake of comedy. I continue scolding him. I go on and on, raising my voice...

▬ ○ ☼

Waking up shortly after 11 a.m.

Strawberry Toaster Pastries. Orange Juice.

All day shift at China Wok.

Egg Salad Sandwich with Tomato. Salt n Vinegar Chips. Honey Green Tea.

While delivering an order out to Shore Drive I decide to take advantage of the travel time and call my mom...

Mom: “You’re like a breath of fresh air calling me.”

The orders are scarce today. I thought it might be busy considering the Super Bowl is tonight but it has the opposite effect. The tips aren’t that great. I’m making about half what I made yesterday in profit. Boo.

Way too much down time. Ling, my boss, explains to me how China is financially independent from the world and how that gives them great independence and autonomy.

Mixed Fruit in Strawberry Yogurt.

A man with a worn out brown jacket and a dramatic looking smile approaches the counter to order food. He’s a little chatty and asks a lot of questions. But he seems harmless. While considering his options on the menu he mentions the verse in the bible (Leviticus) where it states one should not eat shellfish.

I respond, “Yeah. Shrimp are the scavengers of the sea. They’re kind of dirty. Maybe that’s what it’s talking about.”

He inquires if we have anything other than Styrofoam or plastic to eat out of.

He turns to Cecily and exclaims, “Do you know what happens when something hot hits Styrofoam? It turns into arsenic! There’s enough arsenic to kill six people.”

Me: “Yeah, I’d stay away from that stuff.”

Fried Chicken with Broccoli, Carrots, Onions, and Rice in Garlic Sauce.

Off work and back home.

I’ve had on and off contact with Aysena. She’s currently visiting her family in Yakutsk, Russia where we have limited communication through email. Tonight I get one. She describes a dream she had the night before:

“one dream with you.
im in yakutsk, it s almost night about 7 or 8pm. i just arrived and want to go outside. so im walking  down the street and im naked. the weather is cold about -40C but i cant feel it. so i keep walking and meet some people . want to talk with them. it seems they dont like me and dont want to talk to me , but then they starting to ask lots of questions.
i woke up (in a dream) and recognized that everyone in yakutsk already knew about yestarday aysenas adventure.
 im embarrasd. your mom , sister (i dunno why) and you over there. i feel like they are nice to me and aint mad at me. they just support me. you are sitting in front of me and scold? me. you are telling me what happened yesterday night. you catched me at night club dancing with some guy, probably i was drunk. you and me are crying. the end.”

James Graves is here. While I clean up in the kitchen we chat about our frustrations with flaky friends and how exhausting it is to make plans with them. Darren comes downstairs and butts in.


Eventually, the three of us ride over to Rick’s Café.

Sipping on my decaf brown water as we listen to Darren’s comedic cynicism. His voice carries across the room. Chatting it up with our favorite waitresses, Autumn and Katerina, who rule the night shift.


Darren: “The strong distaste I have for the shit that’s gone on at our house and how I can’t reconcile the fact that I really do not want to be a kid anymore. I don’t wanna be a teenager anymore. I’m tired of people being immature. Like, I wanna, quote unquote, grow up. I can’t do that where I’m living. I feel like it gets me angry and...stresses me out.”

Me: “I get it.”


I take notice to how after 20 minutes have past Darren hasn’t even taken the wrapper bit off his straw.

James assures, “That’s cause he’s like, I don’t use a straw. I don’t need no goddamn sissy sticks.

Me: “Heh-heh. Sissy sticks.”

Darren: “That is kinda how I feel about straws. 


I ask Darren, “Dude, have you ever thought about doing stand-up comedy?”

Darren: “No. It’s funny when I’m in the moment.”

Me: “Ah. You should.”

Darren: “I’m not a commodity. If you like me and you wanna experience me, then fine. You’re one of the lucky few.”


James turns to me, “Robert, we’re one of the lucky few.”

Me: “I know. I tell myself that every day.”


Darren: “The only thing about dating a girl with a kid is just like I don’t think I should be around kids.”

James: “I agree!”

Me: “I agree, too.”

Darren: “I feel like the kid’s gonna be like atheist, gonna hate the world, be super cynical, drinking alcohol...”


Back home. Releasing a cathartic dump in the bathroom. It felt like a whole year’s worth of waste just escaped my body.

Sleep 4 a.m.

[i] Styrofoam Cup Art.

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