Thursday October 3 2013

Europa Report image.[i]

Heavy, heavy dreams full of rich details and scenarios. All that alcohol I drank the night before kept me sedated and locked into a sweet dream world.

Downstairs, sharing with Ana bowls of Hot Cinnamon Oat Bran with Brown Sugar, Maca, Flax Seed, and Milk. Drinking this Booze Tea that's been in the pantry for a while now.

Ana drives me to pick up my car at the shop. Then, we drop Sasha off in Croatan for her nanny job.

Back home. Making a light lunch for us: Egg Salad Sandwich, Salad with Vegan Cheese, Veggie and Flax Seed Tortilla Chips with Hummus. Orange Juice.

I notice something a little off, her face a little more solemn. I ask if she's okay. And she really is. Its just a part of her personality to give off this look of indifference sometimes. She said she realized how stressed out she was when we drove back to the house. I guess something happened at her holistic healing appointment yesterday that brought to light some issues with fear.

"I don't like being vulnerable," she exclaims. And then with a smile adds, "Especially around you!"

Me: "But it's okay to be vulnerable around people you trust."

She hugs me before she leaves.

Her: "I don't wanna get too close to you."

With a smirk I respond, "I don't know what makes you think you'll be able to control that."

Ana bursts out with laughter.

At the Rec Center for organized basketball. Compared to last time where I made about 80% of my shots I feel dissatisfied with my game play; this time I'm missing 80% of my shots. Whenever I'm shooting around by myself it's easy as pie but it's hard to focus under pressure.

Grilled Salmon with Onions, Carrots, String Beans, and Rice. Red Wine.

Watching Europa Report (2013).


Sleep around 3 a.m.

[i] Europa Report image.

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