Thursday January 3 2013


Waking up just before 1 p.m.

Cinnamon Oatmeal with Bananas, Raisins, Brown Sugar, and Milk. Orange Juice.

Continuing to re-watch Cloud Atlas (2012).

I understand now, that boundaries between noise and sound are conventions. All boundaries are conventions, waiting to be transcended. One may transcend any convention, if only one can first conceive of doing so. Moments like this, I can feel your heart beating as clearly as I feel my own, and I know that separation is only an illusion. My life extends far beyond the limitations of me.” — Robert Frobisher (Cloud Atlas)

Picking up a new dryer from a guy off Rosemont. He’s got a garage full of various antiques like a Sinclair Dino gas pump and an old coke machine.

Egg on an English Muffin with Mayonnaise and Tomato. Goldfish Crackers.

While pulling the old dryer out from the laundry closet we discover a pile of discarded clothing and lint and, more importantly about $14 in coins and bills. We put this money towards the cost of the new dryer.

Coffee with a Blondie Brownie.

Staying in my room – researching – exercising – dancing.

At random I get a text from Margot requesting for some moving help at the end of the month. She’ll be out of her condo in Ocean Trace, a place I used to spend many nights at. Apparently she’s moving into a place with a bunch of boys she doesn’t know very well but says gets along with. I immediately feel threatened, but just a little. I don’t know why. It’s strange how even after so much time spent apart I still feel a sense of entitlement, like I have the right to an opinion on the way she lives her life. I think I’ll always hold onto a remnant of bittersweet emotions with her.  

While making dinner in the kitchen in conversation with Tristan, both cracking light humor.

Tristan: “One thing I know is where food is.”


Darren steps in briefly and comments about the food I’m making, “It smells like shit.”

Me: “Okay.”

Darren: “You smell like shit.”

Me: “Okay.”

He exits the kitchen. I turn to Tristan and, with sarcasm, remark, “Darren. He’s so encouraging.”

Tristan: “He needs kids.”

Me: “Oh God. No!”

Tristan: “Put him in one of those hyperbolic time chambers and pop em’ out, see em’ full grown, and see how that went.”


Spaghetti with Onions, Red Peppers, and Tomato Puttanesca Sauce. Salad. Two Frosted Sugar Cookies (that Tristan brought over).

I briefly join the group in Darren’s room for a few minutes to watch Pan’s Labyrinth (2006).

Anthony: “Hey Kevin, tell Robert what you just heard about earlier...about the economy.”

Me: “What’d you hear about the economy?”

Kevin: “The economy’s bad.”

Me: “What?! You should tell someone.”

Doing some chores. Sipping on a Hard Cider. Researching.

Sleep 3:30 a.m.

[i] Kilian Eng.

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